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1x19 The Siege - Part 1


The Siege - Part 1


Doctor Rodney McKay

Day 29 - Entry 1
Note to Zelenka: STFU!! I want to be the one to tell everyone we’re royally screwed if the satellite doesn’t work, dammit!!

Day 29 - Entry 2
OMGWTF??! No undue pressure?!! That’s plenty undue pressure there, missy!! I’m a dead man... *cries*

Day 29 - Entry 3
AH HA! Zelenka admitted I’m smarter than him!!! Huzzah!! *raises arms in victory*

Day 29 - Entry 4
Does this space suit make me look fat? What are Miller and Grodin snickering about?!

Day 29 - Entry 5
OMG! I only have eight hours of air in this space suit?! I’m a dead man... Wheee! I’m floating! This would be fun if I weren’t claustrophobic. *helmetwall*

Day 29 – Entry 6
Note to Grodin: Stop mocking me! I’m TEH Genius, dammit!

Day 29 - Entry 7
Yay! I’m out of the claustrophobic spacesuit! Yay! I’m floating! Yay! I’m on the floor... OMGOWW! MY BACK!!! Is Peter trying to KILL ME?!! *is in pain*

Day 29 – Entry 8
Wonderful! We need to go outside to fix the satellite weapons. *headwall* Guess who got the short straw... pencil... thingy??? ME! I’m a dead man!! *cries*

Day 29 - Entry 9
Back in the claustrophobia suit. Ugh. One small step and one giant leap... into the side of the satellite. Ow! No one saw that!! *looks around*

Day 29 - Entry 10
I’m a genius! I fixed the satellite weapons. Now how do I get back to the Jumper???!!

Day 29 - Entry 11
Yay! The satellite worked... once. Crap.

Day 29 – Entry 12
ZOMG!!!Wraithbait!!! They just blew up Peter with the satellite!!!!eleventyone111!! We failed! I’m a dead man. Poor Grodin! *angsts*



Doctor Radek Zelenka

Day 8 - Entry 1
Note to McKay: I will NOT STFU because it takes you forever to get to a point and we only have 40 minutes in this episode 49 hours before the Wraith arrive.

Day 8 - Entry 2
ZOMG!!!! I DID NOT SAY RODNEY IS SMARTER THAN I AM!!!!

Day 8 - Entry 3
Rodney is off being spaceman, and I get to make self-destruct simulation and make computer virus to wipe out the Ancient database... Who has the more exciting job now?! Rar! Damn, he does…*headdesk*

Day 8 – Entry 4
Uh oh, Doctor Weir doesn’t look happy... Maybe I should have lied and said we could save 10% of the database? :\

Day 8 – Entry 5
Oh noes! I took us 2 episodes to realize the Wraith can beam into the city! *headdesk*



Major John Sheppard

Day 31 - Entry 1
Are these “we’re screwed” meetings getting bigger each time?!

Day 31 – Entry 2
Der... I have no idea what McKay and Zelenka are saying?! *eyefucks Elizabeth to pass the time*

Day 31 - Entry 3
Sweet! I get to stay and have impending doom sex look for new Alpha sites with Elizabeth and Third-wheel Bates... Ugh.

Day 31 - Entry 4
Note to Bates: OMG! Leave me alone you paranoid freak!!! I’d rather be attacked by a T-Rex than listen to you rant about how useless Teyla is because I already know that.

Day 31 - Entry 5
Uh... Okay, maybe I rather deal with Bates instead of being attacked by a T-Rex. Who knew they still existed in this galaxy?!!! *twitches*

Day 31 - Entry 6
Teyla and Bates are fighting... again. *facepalm* CHILDREN!!! GO TO YOUR ROOMS NOW!!! RAWR!!!

Day 31 – Entry 7
Note to Ford: Didn’t I tell you to stop naming things EVAR?! So STOP! Kthanxbai!

Day 31 - Entry 8
See Teyla listened to me and stayed in her room, but Bates stayed in the wrong room and got the crap kicked out of him... *facepalm*

Day 32 - Entry 1
OMG! There’s a Wraith in the city! Now if Beckett got the results faster, we wouldn’t have wasted the morning trying to find Teyla’s alibi. *headdesk*

Day 32 - Entry 2
OMG! I got shot by a Wraith stunner AGAIN! And I’m screwed... Bob, please go away!

Day 32 - Entry 3
For once Ford and Teyla have perfect timing... I feel all tingly inside... again. Stupid Wraith. *pokes Bob*

Day 33 - Entry 1
Bob is not going to talk. I liked Steve better. I’ll just kill Bob. Bob reminds me too much of the Hannibal!Wraith. *shoots Bob repeatedly*

Day 33 - Entry 2
OMGWTF?! Dude! Just die already! How many more times do I need to poke you reload?! Where’s my P-90?! Never mind he’s dead now... About damn time. Rar!



Lieutenant Aiden Ford

Day 26 - Entry 1
Holy Crap! We found Jurassic Park! It’s not on some remote island on Earth!! It’s in the Pegasus Galaxy!! It’s Jurassic Planet!! Or maybe it’s the Lost World!!! *_*

Day 26 - Entry 2
Ooh! FIGHT!! OMG! I don’t know who to cheer for! Bates is a fellow Marine. Teyla fellow teammate and she’s hot... Hos before bros man. *wink*

Day 26 - Entry 3
ZOMG! What’s wrong with Planet Waterfall?! I like the name Planet Waterfall. It’s more logical then M-blah-blah-eat-my-shorts.

Day 26 - Entry 4
Holy Crab cakes! Now I’m hungry. Bates totally got the shit kicked out of him. O_O

Day 27 - Entry 1
We have a Wraith in the city! It’s Wraith huntin’ time. *grins*

Day 27 - Entry 2
Yay! We have a new pet Wraith!Bob. *goes and pokes it with a stick*

Day 28 - Entry 1
Awww, Major Sheppard killed our new pet. Guess he didn’t feel like feeding him... *snickers*



Sergeant Bates

Day 8 – Entry 1
Note to TPTB: ZOMG! Is having me witness Doctor Weir and the Major having Eye!Sex punishment for me being an asshole???

Day 8 - Entry 2
Unscheduled off-world activation!! ZOMG! It’s totally Teyla fault!!! *points finger at her*

Day 8 - Entry 3
ZOMFG!!! THE BITCH HIT ME!!! Crap, the Major is here. This is SO not over, bitch! *evil eyes Teyla and runs away*

Day 8 - Entry 4
So my real punishment for being a Jackass is to be beaten to a bloody pulp. Thank you SO much, TPTB! *gives you the BIRD*



Doctor Elizabeth Weir

Day 29 – Entry 1
Our last line of defense is a dead Ancient weapons satellite... Yup, we are FUBAR!! *headdesk*

Day 29 - Entry 2
Damn Wraiths. If they didn't mark our damn Alpha site, I could be doing something useful like having impending doom sex finding more ZPMs before we die... *headdesk*

Day 29 - Entry 3
Note to Zelenka: Thank you for making sure I’ll never sleep again by showing me how we plan to BLOW UP THE CITY! *headdesk*

Day 29 – Entry 4
WTF?! Bates called me here to watch him bitch at Teyla??? Ugh, and we still don’t have an Alpha site. *facepalm*

Day 29 – Entry 5
Note to Halling: The Ancients are NEVER COMING BACK! So STFU and get out of my face now! RAWR!!!

Day 29 - Entry 6
We can only save seven or eight percent of the database?!!! If only Rodney slept with that Daganian chick, we’d have a ZPM now. *facepalm*

Day 30 – Entry 1
ZOMG! Now we have a Wraith in the city??! We should have Wraith alarms or something. Oh, we do, but we didn’t have enough power to turn them on. *facepalm*

Day 31 – Entry 1
Yay! We got rid of one hive ship!!! Squeee!!

Day 32 – Entry 2
OMG!!NO!!! They killed our satellite and Peter! *cries* I guess it’s time for the “We’re screwed speech.” *headdesk*



Teyla Emmagan

Day 26 - Entry 1
Er, where is everyone????! Where is Major Sheppard???! Why am I the only one in the infirmary!!!

Day 26 – Entry 2
Yay, Major Sheppard finally came to visit me!! Squee!!

Day 26 – Entry 3
WTF?! He just came, asked Beckett if I was okay, put me back on active duty, and left!!! Where’s the angst? Where’s the love? Where’s the ounce of concern in his voice? Why don’t I getting any eyefucking action??? *sobs*

Day 26 – Entry 4
OMGWTFBBQ??!!! Bates just accused of me working with the Wraith?!! I’M GOING TO KICK HIS ASS!!!

Day 26 – Entry 5
Major Sheppard defended me! Squee! Then he proceeded to give Doctor Weir another Eyefuck of Doom!! Argh! *Uses Bates as punching bag*

Day 26 - Entry 6
OMG! Major Sheppard just yelled at me! He’s supposed love and side with me for decking Bates!

Day 26 - Entry 7
WTF?!Wraithjelly! Major Sheppard told me to go to my room ALONE!!! *cries*

Day 26 - Entry 8
Bates got the crap beaten out of him. Hehe... ZOMG!! I didn’t do it!!

Day 27 - Entry 1
Wow, now I feel stupid. I had the “Wraith sense” for about 2 weeks and I didn’t realize we have a Wraith in the city. Gawd, I am useless! *headdesk*

Day 27 – Entry 2
Yay! We came just in time to save my love! How dare you touch my love you stupid Wraith! *kicks Bob*

Day 28 – Entry 1
OMG! My head!! Major Sheppard killed the Wraith to save me! He loves me and my head is hurts like whoa... *head esplodes*



Doctor Carson Beckett

Day 21 - Entry 1
Yay! I can hide the infirmary all episode because Rodney isn’t here and force me to sit in the control chair. Huzzah! *fist pumps*

Day 21 - Entry 2
Oh dear, Sergeant Bates doesn’t look too good at all.

Day 22 - Entry 3
Holy crap! We have a Wraith in the city! I have to leave my safe haven of the infirmary to tell Doctor Weir!! *flails*



Doctor Peter Grodin

Day 12 – Entry 1
Everyone whose butt is numb from sitting for fifteen hours raise your hand! *raises hand*

Day 12 - Entry 2
McKay looks like the Michelin Man in that suit... *snickers*

Day 12 – Entry 3
Note to Mckay: If you don’t hurry up, I’m going to continue mocking you. Hehe. *bg*

Day 12 - Entry 4
Er, I almost killed Rodney today... Now he’s being snarky to me. >_<

Day 12 - Entry 5
Woohoo! I got the long straw... pencil... piece... whatever. Wait a minute, I are we all wearing red-wannabe suits? O_o

Day 12 - Entry 6
OMG! Rodney is taking for-frakin-ever just to get into position... *thump* Did Rodney just hit the side of the satellite? *snickers*

Day 12 - Entry 7
Crap... I’m stuck in the satellite. I’m definitely a dead man. I’m not even kidding. I’m a dead man... *twitch twitch sobs*

Day 12 - Entry 8
Yay! Took out a wraith hive ship!! Crap, weapons overload...

KABOOM!!!

[Audience: NOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!! GROOODDIINN!! *sobs*]



Lieutenant Miller

Day 1 – Entry 1
Note to my butt: You can wake up now. The fifteen hour flight is finally over...

Day 1 - Entry 2
McKay looks like the Stay Puff Marshmallow Man in Ghostbusters. *snickers*

Day 1 - Entry 3
Er, You know, I really won for Rock, Paper, Scissors. Because Rock would wait for Scissors to cut up Paper then SMASH Scissors and Rock WINS!! But noooo, they wanted to draw straws... :\

Day 1 – Entry 4
Um… I’m just the driver. Do I really have to draw straws?! I don’t even know what I’m supposed to do!! *flails*

Day 1 – Entry 5
OMG!Yay! I drew a long piece! *reliefs*

Day 1 – Entry 6
LMFAO!! McKay crashed into the side of the satellite. *giggles*

Day 1 - Entry 7
OMG!!! Peter Grodin went KABOOM! *sobs*



Bob Wraith

Day 1 - Entry 1
Stupid humans! I’ve been here for two weeks and you just find me now. *hiss rawr* You will never stop us! *hiss rawr*

Day 1 – Entry 2
Haha, I shot you, Major! Now I will— Damn, I got shot too. *thud*

Day 2 - Entry 1
ZOMG! Will they stop poking me?!! Because of that I’m not going to talk to them. *hiss rawr*

Day 2 - Entry 2
Is this puny human trying to read my mind?! Silly child! Just for that, I’m going to give you a gigantic migraine! RAWR!!!

Day 2 - Entry 3
I lied when I said my wounds would heal…*dies after being shot a million times* *hiss rawr* We will never stop!! *hiss rawr* *dies for real this time* *hiss rawr*



Techie Chuck

Day 3 – Entry 1
Oh noes! The satellite was destroyed, the Wraith are coming, and Doctor Weir just gave the DOOM Speech. We’re going to die! We can’t! I don’t have a name yet! *flails*
Tags: season 1
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